Unwrapping the Past: Best Birthday Toys

It was my birthday a couple of weeks ago – 48-freaking-years-old. I was excited to get a cordless drill from my mom. What’s happened to me? I remember all the wonderful birthdays filled with action figures and underoos. It’s got me thinking about a frequent guest in my birthdays growing up – the Masters of the Universe. I have a lot of memories of He-Man and his friends and enemies, including a birthday where I got 3 Man-E-Faces figures. 

My friend gave me his on the way to school that morning. I received a new one from another friend during my birthday party, and then there was one on my cake with the message “Happy Birthday and Have Man-E-More!” I have never had a finer birthday cake (2nd place had Megatron defeating Optimus on it for a birthday somewhere in my 30s).

I also remember receiving a Wind Raider for my birthday; it might have been the same day, I just recall opening it at night at a table in the hall by myself. But one of the coolest memories I have featuring the Strongest Man in the Universe was a life-size pin-the-sword-on-He-Man that my mom made for a birthday party for my brother. I wish to Eternia I still had a picture of that because she did a damn good job drawing the character and the sword.

He-Man wasn’t the only cartoon toyline I have memories of receiving, but with Transformers, I had a lot less luck. I remember a few years later receiving in the mail from my aunt the Autobot tow truck Hoist. 

I took him out of the box and ran to the garage, planning to play with it out there. I didn’t think anything of it at the time, but my brother was already playing out there with his Matchbox cars. Specifically, smashing them with a hammer. I set Hoist down on the cement, ran back to my room to grab a few more Transformers, and came back to tragedy. My brother had completely destroyed Hoist before I even had a chance to transform him. I owned him for less than half an hour, and there he was, a pile of demolished plastic and screws. I was heartbroken, but everyone said I should have seen it coming. I think it was the start of my string of bad luck with Transformers, but luckily, the Kickback I received the previous year had stuck around for a while.

The next year, I recall getting one of the Monster Minds from Jayce and the Wheeled Warriors. I’m pretty sure it was Terror Tank, the one with the clamping jaws. Ironically, it was from the same aunt who gave me Hoist the following year, but at least this one survived in my toybox for a long time. We had my party at a pizza place, and it tells you something about me that I can only remember the toy I got that year and not where we went or which friends might have come along.

Image courtesy of Figurerealm

Not all of my recent birthdays are full of power tools and socks, though; a few years ago, my awesome wife ordered me the Mega Construx Snake Mountain. Suffice to say, I was shocked to open that big-ass box. I still need to find some time to assemble that one (and finish the Technodrome that I got before that). At least the toys from my childhood were a lot easier to put together.

What were your favorite toys you received for your birthday? What was the best cake you ever received?